A Day For Me

I do a lot of wishing when it comes to cars. We’re a one-vehicle household now, with no need for more than one. Nevertheless I do dream about owning a new car, no matter how unrealistic or unnecessary it is. I am confident that my ladyfriend is tired of me pointing out vehicles and saying “I want that!”. So a trip to the Vancouver Auto Show was pretty much a way to appease me. I could sit in all the cars I want without being bothered by salespeople. So here’s a rundown of the event as we saw it.

Highlights

The Audi TT - I have fallen in love thrice in my life: with my wife, with Mandy Moore, and with the TT. While I’ve managed to reel in my wife, I think acquiring Mandy or a TT are equally unlikely. This is my dream car, and I finally got to sit in it. While biased, I believe the TT was without equal, after sitting in the Porsche Boxster and Carrera, the Honda S2000, the Mini Convertible, and the Volkswagon Eos. The seats are like being cradled by the German Auto Gods, the quality of the interior was luxurious, and the price is … well, close to 40 large. If I ever win a lottery, I’m buying one.

The Chevy Volt - I don’t usually get excited about new cars, but GM’s Volt concept is one of two things that I really wanted to see at the show. It was roped off, of course (it is still just a concept) but if GM can actually pull this thing off, it could be the most important car made in ages. For those not familiar, the Volt is expected to be the most efficient electric-gas hybrid created. It’s supposed to drive up to 60km on electricity alone, which means most commuters may never have to buy gas. For longer road trips, it can use gasoline and electric to drive up to 1000km on one tank. Supposedly it will also let you fill with any type of fuel - biodiesel, unleaded, diesel, ethanol, whatever. It’s all very lofty and with a street date of 2010, I do wonder just how much of this talk will be reality. But I do hope GM can pull it off. Plus, the styling of the Volt concept is very attractive; it looks “futuristic” without looking stupid.

Subcompacts and Hatchbacks - When our current vehicle dies, I plan on replacing it with a fuel-sipping hatchback. Last year I test drove the Kia Rio5, Chevy Aveo, and Toyota Yaris, so this was a chance to check out the rest of the field: the Suzuki SX4, the Dodge Caliber (shown), and the Honda Fit. The Suzuki is adequate and has great styling, the Dodge is a little ugly and has poor visibility, but the Honda really trumps everything in its class. I’m still not a fan of the exterior but inside is where the magic happens. A cavernous cargo area and huge windows, along with high quality interior make this the top of the list to consider as a used car in a couple years.

The Mitsubishi Girls - There was a noticable absence of tawdry girls draped over cars, but Mitsubishi treaded slightly into the auto show tradition of misogyny awesomeness by having pretty girls at their booth. While not trashy in the least - they looked more like airline attendants than anything - there was one that my ladyfriend snapped a photo of, since I’m too chicken to do so.

Lowlights

Ford - In 20 years or so, when Ford finally files for bankruptcy and is auctioned off to the Chinese, I’m sure some people will lament its death. But really, when a company makes the worst vehicles on the continent for forty years and misses the boat on fuel efficiency, it’s hard to believe Ford has lasted into this century. Everything Ford had on show was boring - even their concept cars were unexciting. I sat in their newest car, the redesigned Focus, and got out after 10 seconds. The whole thing felt cheap and poorly put together - probably because it IS cheap and poorly put together. The sooner Ford quits making cars the better.

All Other Convertibles/Roadsters - The Honda, Porsche, VW, and Mini convertibles were all unimpressive. The Honda was not built for anyone tall and was uncomfortable; the Porsches (Carrera shown) had a pathetically cheap quality to them; the Mini’s interior was a vomitous blend of chrome bezels and circular gauges and was cramped beyond belief. The VW was actually the best non-Audi cabriolet we sat in, but I’ve vowed never to purchase a Volkswagon (and for $37k, I won’t be). Actually, the convertible Smart Car was surprisingly roomy and well laid out - I’d like to find a way to rent one for a weekend. It’s just disconcerting, in the Smart Car, to think that the end of your vehicle is about 16 inches behind your butt.

Luxury Cars - Part of the appeal of an auto show is to sit in cars you’d never buy: for us this meant Lexus and Mercedes-Benz. We only found one Lexus that was unlocked. Unbelievable. And this one had a salesperson watching it like a hawk. Way to make people feel comfortable, guys. I guess they don’t unlock them until you show them your expense account. Since Lexus was a bunch of locked-door jerks, we sat in a couple Benzes instead. Luxurious - wood panelling on the dash and leather on the doors - and, with the doors closed, almost hermetically sealed and soundproof. I guess that’s what 65 grand gets you. There was a Lotus on display too (shown), but curiously was behind ropes with the Bentleys and Ferraris. This despite the price of a Lotus being a fraction of the other two types. I would have liked to sit in one, to pretend I was a rich douchebag for a couple minutes.

The No-lights

Saab - People buy these things? Seriously?
Acura, Cadillac, Volvo - Snooze. Volvo has a hatchback with one interesting feature, a hatch door that’s glass rather than metal body plus glass. It retails for $37 grand. For a three door Volvo.
Saturn - See Saab.
Kia - For all of Kia’s advertising in Canada, you’d think they would have had more than one minivan and one sedan on show. Huge disappointment. I wanted to sit in the Rio5 again, after test driving it two years ago. No such luck.
Infiniti, Jaguar, Land Rover - I’m not a real estate agent or investment banker, so these cars don’t appeal to me.
Mazda - Snore. Mazda cars are visually pretty dull and safe in terms of appeal. My brother and his wife own a Mazda 3 wagon, which we’ve sat in for a road trip to Banff. No reason to sit in one again here.

There’s plenty more photos from the big day on Flickr. Be sure to check them out.

Better Than Slander

One of the biggest video game franchises in the last couple of years has been Guitar Hero. If you’re not familiar with it, it’s a game that includes a guitar-shaped controller to push buttons and strum in time with music. It’s simple to learn and very hard to master. So far there have been four Guitar Hero games released and Rock Band has recently upped the ante with including a drum kit and microphone for the complete band experience.

As the owner of Guitar Hero 3, it got me thinking about what could be put together for a special Canadian Content Edition. Here’s my tracklist for such a dream product:

Rock You - Helix
Ordinary Day - Great Big Sea
Everything Is Automatic - The Matthew Good Band
Having An Average Weekend - Shadowy Men on a Shadowy Planet
Rockin’ in the Free World - Neil Young
American Woman - The Guess Who
Go For A Soda - Kim Mitchell
Takin’ Care of Business - Bachman Turner Overdrive
New Orleans is Sinking - The Tragically Hip
Crazy On You - Heart
Rave + Drool - The Killjoys
Ride From Hell - Thor
Machine Punch Through - Moist
Bandages - Hot Hot Heat
Monster Hospital - Metric
Rockstar - Nickelback (yeah … sorry, but they’re successful)
Millenium - Front Line Assembly
Diggin’ A Hole - Big Sugar
Closer To The Heart - Rush
Workin’ For The Weekend - Loverboy
Raise A Little Hell - Trooper
Magic Carpet Ride - Steppenwolf
Summer of 69 - Bryan Adams

Phew! And this doesn’t include Alanis Morrisette (no real guitar-rock songs), Roch Voisine (one province out of 10 does not count), or Our Lady Peace (barf). You know, looking at this list, a lot of these songs would be memorable even to Americans. Maybe I should write the good folks at Activision a letter.

Did I miss any? I’m not hip to much music - I had my ladyfriend help brainstorm - so please leave your suggestions in the comments!

Enough Already.

People who get upset. Vancouver seems to have a strong history of complainers. Two latest examples: people in Whistler upset over some trees being cut down to build an Olympic podium. Where were these people when, you know, the trees were cut down to build the ski hill or the f-ing condos they live in? Earlier this week people got their hackles up over proposed power generation on some rivers north of Pitt Meadows. We can’t do that, think of the fish! You know, the fish adapted alright 50 years ago when half the province was dammed and flooded. But okay, I guess we’ll go on buying power from American coal burning plants.

The Federal Liberal Party. What’s their purpose anyway? What do they stand for? Is their party slogan “Don’t go anywhere, we have a good idea somewhere”? I challenge anyone to name a Liberal party idea or platform without going to their website. Say what you will about Jean Chretien, but at least you know where he and his party stood.

Blackberries. No, not the fruit. The gadget. I can’t stop railing against these instruments of humanity’s downfall. If everyone who owned one suddenly contracted herpes, I’d be secretly very happy. Actually, that’s not true. I’d be outwardly happy and take great joy seeing someone play with their Blackberry, because I’d know they have herpes.

Photos of concrete and grey cityscapes. This could offend readers of this blog, but seriously: the world does not need more photos of the corners of buildings set against cloudy skies, or photos of concrete buildings reflected in a puddle, or something else equally gloomy and emo. If you’re 30-something and own an SLR, do the world a favour and take photos of butterflies or rainbows or badgers for a change. Expand your horizons, and stop it with the emo photos.

Equating bad weather with global warming. How long has the world kept track of weather? 120 years, probably less? Just because there’s a tornado in Kansas or a flood in Zanzibar doesn’t mean it’s the result of too many cars on the road. The earth is going to do what it wants, when it wants, and doesn’t have to explain itself. I’m not saying we’re not ruining our way of life. But to draw one line from weather patterns to global warming is shortsighted and stupid. There are so many factors that go into weather - which is something that even after 120 years we’re still incapable of understanding - that to connect only two dots in this picture puzzle is ludicrous.

Superhero movies. Okay, so this average guy who’s socially awkward is endowed, through some error, with abilities that normal people don’t possess, and everyone is scared of this person and turns against him or her when all he or she wants is to be loved and understood. Which superhero did I just describe? Oh, that’s right - all of them. Can we stop having movies made about the same goddamn thing already? Repeat that question for anything involving Will Farrell, too.

Welcome Back, Jesus!

What better way to spend the Easter weekend - a Jesus-based holiday, which for some reason we Canadians still celebrate - than watching Jesus Christ Superstar? Well that’s exactly what we did Friday night. Earlier that day we made a trip to White Rock with the dog, only to find out that White Rock Beach has a no-dog-anywhere policy. So we walked the ’strip’ and had lunch before heading to the much more dog-friendly Crescent Beach nearby.

Saturday we headed to the Vancouver Home Show, which was a huge disappointment. In the past, this show featured the Glidehouse, a super cool postmodern prefab home. This year, the highlight was (for me, anyway) an Audi TT. The actual home show portion was mostly finishings for the home and concept furniture that no one would want to sit on. Oh, and lots of hotel-grade art. The whole thing took us less than an hour to walk around … twice. After ditching the home show we went to Cafe Artigiano for the best coffee in town, then to Agent Provocateur to try and pick up one of their naughty lingerie catalog-storybooks. Unfortunately that was a bust too. Pun intended.

Sunday was a big family dinner, replete with turkey and ham and stuffing, with my in-laws. Delicious! I ate way too much, as I usually do at big dinners.

Factoid: a pack of three Lindt chocolate eggs contains 101% of your daily recommended intake of saturated fats.

Finally, since I’m not a lazy government employee, I had to work today (Easter Monday). A good thing to this is that the train to work was only half-full. Clearly a lot of union and/or government employees take the train every day.

There must be another way

As my ladyfriend and I try to become more social, we’re starting to notice a trend in the way we meet with friends and family. More often than not, doing things with people has become going out for dinner with people. It’s happened so much that she and I both realized there has to be a better and less costly way to see friends.

I don’t mind going out for dinner now and then. In fact I think it’s necessary - it’s a good way to eat new foods and find favourite places to dine. But when dining out is the only event you do when you see others, it gets pretty expensive. I think I’ve plopped down close to $150 on dinners this month, and I’m not even sure the restaurant visits were the best places to enjoy someone else’s company.

So we’ll have to lobby friends to not go to dinner for the purposes of social lubrication, but not rule out the delicious options involved in eating. Basically this means going out for coffee (good coffee, when possible) or gelato, playing a board game, looking at our stamp collection, or even watching a movie at home where we can fix a martini from our collection of unused liquor. You know, something suitably white-person-ish awesome.

Shakin’ Shamrocks!

Mini-game week ended on Friday, and everyone was given the chance to show off their games to the studio. There were about 15 games altogether, and some very creative ideas on display. Two games in particular stood out: one was a puzzle game based on getting your opponent drunk (I’d rate that one “M” for Mature), and one that was a four-player game that involved getting your creatures from one side of a grid to the other using directional tiles. So simple, yet very strategic and the level of polish of this game was amazing. It could have easily been released on Xbox Live with just a few tweaks to make it complete. I didn’t stick around for the judging and prizes being awarded but I’d be surprised if that game did not win “best in show”.

Yesterday, with dreams of a tax return dancing in our heads, we went to look at furniture. In our apartment we have exactly one sofa and one uncomfortable reclining chair, not exactly a winning combination for hosting guests. Our hope is to buy a sectional sofa and - well, this one’s more for me - a real recliner. After sitting in about two dozen recliners, I certainly found some I like, but damn if they aren’t expensive. I’m going to have to comb the classifieds more before I actually consider a new one. Overall there’s one furniture trend that neither of us are hot about: leather. Yes, it’s luxurious, but it’s just not welcoming in my opinion. Plus, factor in hot and humid summers without A/C and I’m not really interested in physically sticking to a chair. On the way home from furniture browsing I stopped for a Shamrock Shake. So phony, yet so tasty. Those leprechauns sure know how to make milkshakes.